"Real Half Sister"
“Real Half Sister ” written by: Marian Palattao, BEED-III. It is our task to criticize the works of our classmates. To criticize is both negative and positive comments.
Ramana is the only one daughter of Mr. ang Mrs. Dela cruz. They belong in a rich family, Her parents very lovable, understanding and kind. Ramana’s parent adopt another child whose name is Mayet, because Mrs. Dela Cruz can’t bear another child. Ramana and Mayet love each other. When they was grow up Mr and Mrs. Dela Cruz decided to brought out the country their real daughter Ramana to pursue her studie s on the state, While Mayet stay here in the Philippines. One day Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz decided to go the state for visiting here daughter.
All of a sudden, unexpected things will happened. Accidentally the plane that Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz riding crash. Fifty people died including Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz. It’s very painful to Ramana’s part it is because she did not saw the body of her parents, because that time she need to finish her studies it’s only half year left , in short she was graduating students. After graduation Ramana go back to the Philippines to visit the tomb of her parents, and also to manage the company that her parents left. She meet Atty. Ambini Atty. Of her parents who hold all the important document of their company. Ramana not staying for a long time here in the Philippines when unexpected things happen to Mayet.
Mayet kidnapped by the kidnappers. Ramana felt depressed and tired again for the another problem that she need to face it. She asked for help to the police. Her maid told her what’s the exact details how Mayet kidnapped. While Ramana trust that the police working on it, She did a call to Atty. Ambini for the important documents that she need to signed. After an hour the police came to the house of Ramana to report what will happened. Also the police investigate the background of Mayet. Asked some question that will help to resolved faster the case. 6:30 am in the morning she took her breakfast and decided to went to the company. She want to check all the important document of her parents left. She noticed that all the original copy of the document hold by Atty. Ambini. Ramana didn’t know that all the documents that Atty. Ambini gave are fake. Atty. Ambini explained all those things. Then Ramana go home and still thinking her half sister. She went to her room thinking everything why it was happened.
After three days at 12:00 o’clock in the evening Mayet knock the door. Mayet escape to the kidnappers because she used her skill in karate. Ramana asked Mayet what will happened then Mayet tell her the truth that Atty. Ambini is the master mind of the crime. And finally, They found that Atty. Ambini is a traitor. Ramana commanded the police to raid the house of Atty. And put him in jail together his companions in kidnapping. And now the real half sisters live happily.
The main character is Ramana, She is kind, helpful, lovable, and stronger in the story. She is the stronger character in the story who play the role until the story end. Other character her half sister Mayet the exiting part on her is when she revealed that Atty. Ambini is the master mind of the kidnapped. Another character is Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz who acts a little role in the story because they died early. Atty. Ambini who is the traitor Atty. of the family.
The dominant impression created by the character is that when Ramana express her anger while she commanded the police to work hard for the security of her half sister. Also when Ramana commanded the police to raid the house of Atty. Ambini and she command them to put him in jail also his companions in kidnapping. For me, the factors that was contribute to this impression are anger and hatred.
The secondary character of the story is Mayet. She relates main character it’s because they were real half sister. There are times that dialogue used to present the characters and also the speeches to reveal their personalities. In the situation that when Ramana’s parents died. She must become stronger to fight what kind of situation she need to face, she is kind and helpful also. In speeches, when Mayet was kidnapped, Ramana not to stop commanding the police until her half sister was not safe. Main character involved with an exterior character, she express her disturbance to the other character. The main character also involved in the interior conflict, When Ramana is always alone in her room and thinking something about her beloved family. Yes, the character involved in the conflict situation when Atty. Ambini the master mind of kidnapped Mayet.
The information presented in the exposition in the story. Is that when they noticed that Atty. Ambini is a traitor even though, Ramana’s parents trust him so much. To expose that Atty. Ambini is already a master mind of kidnapped. The movement of plot starts when Ramana going back in the Philippines to manage the company, and to face the different problem that she encountered. Rising action of the story when Ramana commanded the police to work hard that time because her half sister are in danger Mayet is not safe. I think she’s very aggressive that time, because the police are very slow to do their task. Understanding what a plot is creates a foundation for an ability to create one. Unfortunately for most writers, they are consumed with the idea of creating the effect of what a plot does without first understanding what a plot is. What a plot does is raise dramatic questions a reader or viewer will follow a story to its conclusion to get answers. What a plot is the process of generating questions around the outcome of a story's dramatic purpose that gives a story a dramatic shape and outcome fulfilling to an audience. A plot operates around the effect of making a story's movement toward resolution and fulfillment dramatic. The catch is that it's only when a story is in motion that it has a movement to block. Without this quality of dramatic tension generated by a plot around a story's movement, a story appears to be a collection of incidents. The incidents may be dramatic individually, but collectively they fail to engage the interest of a readers. They fail because they lack a discernible purpose that arises out of resolving a story's dramatic purpose
The climax of the story is the turning point of the story; the moment when the ultimate suspense reaches its peak. Climax is the problem of the story.
Many believe the climax is the most intense or interesting part of the movie. This is a common mistake as the climax is when the theme is proven, which commonly is the most interesting or memorable scene. After the climax, the story cannot be proven anymore, or there is no more story to tell other than the conclusion. The climax of the story starts when the plane of Mr. And Mrs. Dela Cruz riding crash, both of them died including the fifty people. Ramana has nothing to do but to cry and cry, because that time she need to finish her studies in state. Also when Mayet was kidnapped. Also when her half sister escape from the kidnapper.
Real half sister are happy because Atty. Ambini also put in jail together with his companions in kidnapping. The conflict resolved at the end of the story when Mayet knock at the door. She went home safety. Mayet knew karate, she used her skill so that she escape from the kidnappers, that time kidnappers drunk an alcohol. So she have time to left. It resolved also when Atty. Ambini put in jail also his companions in kidnapping with the help of the police. Conflict resolution is conceptualized as the methods and processes involved in facilitating the peaceful ending of some social conflict. Often, committed group members attempt to resolve group conflicts by actively communicating information about their conflicting motives or ideologies to the rest of the group. It may be important to note that the term conflict resolution may also be used interchangeably with dispute resolution, where arbitration and litigation processes are critically involved. Furthermore, the concept of conflict resolution can be thought to encompass the use of nonviolent resistance measures by conflicted parties in an attempt to promote effective resolution.
The one who are telling the story is the narrator. The points of view used to discussed this story is the omniscient third person. The narrator is also a character within the story, he or she is sometimes known as the viewpoint character. The narrator is one of three entities responsible for story-telling of any kind. The others are the author and the audience; the latter called the "reader" when referring specifically to literature.
Some of the evidence that it is being told from this particular point of view like this scene: “It’s okay Nanny, you don’t have to worry, the police will take care of this case”. Said Ramana trying to calm Nanny, and strengthen her faith that sooner, a miracle will happen and Mayet will be found. In this scene the character think in advance that her sister was safe, she encourage her Nanny not to worry, but deep inside she encourage also herself to become strong. If the story changed were told from another point of view for omniscient third person it will became limited third person the narrator cannot see into the minds of the characters.
As I was observed about this story, I feel happy because the title is nice, but I feel sad because the writer don’t delivered clearly the story. Are you able to relate the story? No, I’m not. To express my reactions to the reader, I would like to react about the plot or a sequence of events. Yes, there’s a conflict but in terms of sequencing the events sometimes there are missing event, what I mean is, the writer shortcuts the events. For me, the title is good but the problem is it’s not clear to me the execution of the story. Some paragraphs are good it delivered it clearly, but some are not fitted because of not proper used of words. I rate this short written by: Marian Palattao titled: “Real Half Sister” with the average of 84%. The author can narrate the story using the omniscient point of view. He can move from character to character, event to event, having free access to the thoughts, feelings and motivations of his characters and he introduces information where and when he chooses. The author tells the story in third person (using pronouns they, she, he, it, etc). We know only what the character knows and what the author allows him/her to tell us. We can see the thoughts and feelings of characters if the author chooses to reveal them to us. In terms of grammar, I can say that there’s a sentences which the words that the writer used is sometimes not fitted. I’m not good in grammar, I admit it but we need to improve it because, I believed practice makes perfect correct grammar trained us to become a good in terms of communication. All I can say is the writer needs better improvement in grammar. Organization of ideas, “Real Half Sister” short story all I can say is half is good but some are not good it’s because there’s a part of the story can’t understand, how the writers express the event that she would like to informed. But in other case half of the story have a clear organization of ideas.
The writer use proper words a little bit but not all. Sentence structure sometimes the writer confusing whether it is a past, present, future participle ect. Paragraphing, yes, she did it good in some other way. For me, I can give suggestion to the writers for her better improvement is that you better know how you’re going to used the parts of the speech in a correct way. Strive for more and don’t stop to accept different learning that you’re encountered. All I can say also is don’t take this comment as negative impact but of course it serves as challenge to become a better, good in writing but also in communication.
Ramana is the only one daughter of Mr. ang Mrs. Dela cruz. They belong in a rich family, Her parents very lovable, understanding and kind. Ramana’s parent adopt another child whose name is Mayet, because Mrs. Dela Cruz can’t bear another child. Ramana and Mayet love each other. When they was grow up Mr and Mrs. Dela Cruz decided to brought out the country their real daughter Ramana to pursue her studie s on the state, While Mayet stay here in the Philippines. One day Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz decided to go the state for visiting here daughter.
All of a sudden, unexpected things will happened. Accidentally the plane that Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz riding crash. Fifty people died including Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz. It’s very painful to Ramana’s part it is because she did not saw the body of her parents, because that time she need to finish her studies it’s only half year left , in short she was graduating students. After graduation Ramana go back to the Philippines to visit the tomb of her parents, and also to manage the company that her parents left. She meet Atty. Ambini Atty. Of her parents who hold all the important document of their company. Ramana not staying for a long time here in the Philippines when unexpected things happen to Mayet.
Mayet kidnapped by the kidnappers. Ramana felt depressed and tired again for the another problem that she need to face it. She asked for help to the police. Her maid told her what’s the exact details how Mayet kidnapped. While Ramana trust that the police working on it, She did a call to Atty. Ambini for the important documents that she need to signed. After an hour the police came to the house of Ramana to report what will happened. Also the police investigate the background of Mayet. Asked some question that will help to resolved faster the case. 6:30 am in the morning she took her breakfast and decided to went to the company. She want to check all the important document of her parents left. She noticed that all the original copy of the document hold by Atty. Ambini. Ramana didn’t know that all the documents that Atty. Ambini gave are fake. Atty. Ambini explained all those things. Then Ramana go home and still thinking her half sister. She went to her room thinking everything why it was happened.
After three days at 12:00 o’clock in the evening Mayet knock the door. Mayet escape to the kidnappers because she used her skill in karate. Ramana asked Mayet what will happened then Mayet tell her the truth that Atty. Ambini is the master mind of the crime. And finally, They found that Atty. Ambini is a traitor. Ramana commanded the police to raid the house of Atty. And put him in jail together his companions in kidnapping. And now the real half sisters live happily.
The main character is Ramana, She is kind, helpful, lovable, and stronger in the story. She is the stronger character in the story who play the role until the story end. Other character her half sister Mayet the exiting part on her is when she revealed that Atty. Ambini is the master mind of the kidnapped. Another character is Mr. and Mrs. Dela Cruz who acts a little role in the story because they died early. Atty. Ambini who is the traitor Atty. of the family.
The dominant impression created by the character is that when Ramana express her anger while she commanded the police to work hard for the security of her half sister. Also when Ramana commanded the police to raid the house of Atty. Ambini and she command them to put him in jail also his companions in kidnapping. For me, the factors that was contribute to this impression are anger and hatred.
The secondary character of the story is Mayet. She relates main character it’s because they were real half sister. There are times that dialogue used to present the characters and also the speeches to reveal their personalities. In the situation that when Ramana’s parents died. She must become stronger to fight what kind of situation she need to face, she is kind and helpful also. In speeches, when Mayet was kidnapped, Ramana not to stop commanding the police until her half sister was not safe. Main character involved with an exterior character, she express her disturbance to the other character. The main character also involved in the interior conflict, When Ramana is always alone in her room and thinking something about her beloved family. Yes, the character involved in the conflict situation when Atty. Ambini the master mind of kidnapped Mayet.
The information presented in the exposition in the story. Is that when they noticed that Atty. Ambini is a traitor even though, Ramana’s parents trust him so much. To expose that Atty. Ambini is already a master mind of kidnapped. The movement of plot starts when Ramana going back in the Philippines to manage the company, and to face the different problem that she encountered. Rising action of the story when Ramana commanded the police to work hard that time because her half sister are in danger Mayet is not safe. I think she’s very aggressive that time, because the police are very slow to do their task. Understanding what a plot is creates a foundation for an ability to create one. Unfortunately for most writers, they are consumed with the idea of creating the effect of what a plot does without first understanding what a plot is. What a plot does is raise dramatic questions a reader or viewer will follow a story to its conclusion to get answers. What a plot is the process of generating questions around the outcome of a story's dramatic purpose that gives a story a dramatic shape and outcome fulfilling to an audience. A plot operates around the effect of making a story's movement toward resolution and fulfillment dramatic. The catch is that it's only when a story is in motion that it has a movement to block. Without this quality of dramatic tension generated by a plot around a story's movement, a story appears to be a collection of incidents. The incidents may be dramatic individually, but collectively they fail to engage the interest of a readers. They fail because they lack a discernible purpose that arises out of resolving a story's dramatic purpose
The climax of the story is the turning point of the story; the moment when the ultimate suspense reaches its peak. Climax is the problem of the story.
Many believe the climax is the most intense or interesting part of the movie. This is a common mistake as the climax is when the theme is proven, which commonly is the most interesting or memorable scene. After the climax, the story cannot be proven anymore, or there is no more story to tell other than the conclusion. The climax of the story starts when the plane of Mr. And Mrs. Dela Cruz riding crash, both of them died including the fifty people. Ramana has nothing to do but to cry and cry, because that time she need to finish her studies in state. Also when Mayet was kidnapped. Also when her half sister escape from the kidnapper.
Real half sister are happy because Atty. Ambini also put in jail together with his companions in kidnapping. The conflict resolved at the end of the story when Mayet knock at the door. She went home safety. Mayet knew karate, she used her skill so that she escape from the kidnappers, that time kidnappers drunk an alcohol. So she have time to left. It resolved also when Atty. Ambini put in jail also his companions in kidnapping with the help of the police. Conflict resolution is conceptualized as the methods and processes involved in facilitating the peaceful ending of some social conflict. Often, committed group members attempt to resolve group conflicts by actively communicating information about their conflicting motives or ideologies to the rest of the group. It may be important to note that the term conflict resolution may also be used interchangeably with dispute resolution, where arbitration and litigation processes are critically involved. Furthermore, the concept of conflict resolution can be thought to encompass the use of nonviolent resistance measures by conflicted parties in an attempt to promote effective resolution.
The one who are telling the story is the narrator. The points of view used to discussed this story is the omniscient third person. The narrator is also a character within the story, he or she is sometimes known as the viewpoint character. The narrator is one of three entities responsible for story-telling of any kind. The others are the author and the audience; the latter called the "reader" when referring specifically to literature.
Some of the evidence that it is being told from this particular point of view like this scene: “It’s okay Nanny, you don’t have to worry, the police will take care of this case”. Said Ramana trying to calm Nanny, and strengthen her faith that sooner, a miracle will happen and Mayet will be found. In this scene the character think in advance that her sister was safe, she encourage her Nanny not to worry, but deep inside she encourage also herself to become strong. If the story changed were told from another point of view for omniscient third person it will became limited third person the narrator cannot see into the minds of the characters.
As I was observed about this story, I feel happy because the title is nice, but I feel sad because the writer don’t delivered clearly the story. Are you able to relate the story? No, I’m not. To express my reactions to the reader, I would like to react about the plot or a sequence of events. Yes, there’s a conflict but in terms of sequencing the events sometimes there are missing event, what I mean is, the writer shortcuts the events. For me, the title is good but the problem is it’s not clear to me the execution of the story. Some paragraphs are good it delivered it clearly, but some are not fitted because of not proper used of words. I rate this short written by: Marian Palattao titled: “Real Half Sister” with the average of 84%. The author can narrate the story using the omniscient point of view. He can move from character to character, event to event, having free access to the thoughts, feelings and motivations of his characters and he introduces information where and when he chooses. The author tells the story in third person (using pronouns they, she, he, it, etc). We know only what the character knows and what the author allows him/her to tell us. We can see the thoughts and feelings of characters if the author chooses to reveal them to us. In terms of grammar, I can say that there’s a sentences which the words that the writer used is sometimes not fitted. I’m not good in grammar, I admit it but we need to improve it because, I believed practice makes perfect correct grammar trained us to become a good in terms of communication. All I can say is the writer needs better improvement in grammar. Organization of ideas, “Real Half Sister” short story all I can say is half is good but some are not good it’s because there’s a part of the story can’t understand, how the writers express the event that she would like to informed. But in other case half of the story have a clear organization of ideas.
The writer use proper words a little bit but not all. Sentence structure sometimes the writer confusing whether it is a past, present, future participle ect. Paragraphing, yes, she did it good in some other way. For me, I can give suggestion to the writers for her better improvement is that you better know how you’re going to used the parts of the speech in a correct way. Strive for more and don’t stop to accept different learning that you’re encountered. All I can say also is don’t take this comment as negative impact but of course it serves as challenge to become a better, good in writing but also in communication.